Guiding Guild

This weekend I spent 26.5 hours over the course of 3 days with a mentor of mine and became a bit of a mentor of his.  It felt good, this mutual mentoring.

In any case, we got into conversations about his relationship with his current man and then got into conversations about relationships in general. There was something about that mixed with the end of a very long week (and the end of the first week of school!) that had me thinking about so many different things. Possibilities. Futures. Lessons. Inspirations.

Somehow, in all of it, I came back to what has been my recent and funny dilemma of patience. I can care about and love a person so patiently. Keep a little chair at the dinner table for them forever until their upset and fear finally dissipate and they come to table.

Sometimes people are in a fight with themselves, inside, and you just have to wait it out.  Not put anything on hold, of course, but, just have that piece of you that thinks of them. Loves them even when you have no idea what they're up to or how they are doing. You wait the fight they're having with themselves out. Wait until they get out of the ring, bloodied by reborn, and come sit by you.

It's a weird reality, but in other ways, it makes total and complete sense:

It can be hard to feel like you are standing still when you grew up on a rickety boat.

(pause)

In other news, I feel proud and endlessly fortunate. Things feel so focused and excited and ready. Doors are opening and connections are revealing themselves in lightning speed. It hasn't even been a full week yet.

But, all of a sudden, all of these things that drew me towards them - all of these strange strands I didn't fully understand- are suddenly lining up. It's like having collected gold and silver pieces of thread over the years and then, one day, they all decide to weave together on the sunniest day you've seen yet. What you're met with is a wall of light and metallic reflection made only more profound by the sun. And you stand there, your mouth slightly open and your eyes stinging a bit from the light, wondering - heart beating in chest - how you could have never seen that this would happen.


be well; be loved,

k.

(image: msurfleet tumblr)