Wednesday, January 9, 2019

The Angel Protecting Your Future, or, For the Love of Lucas

I.

The issue with magic and the existence of angels is that if one does not believe in either or both, they will miss it and/or run it over with their car.

II.

It has been quite a (long) six days.

Friday afternoon I received an envelope mailed to my house by a former date of mine from a while back that included a beautiful letter of thank you and a handmade gift.

I will use this as my beginning simply because it was a notable moment of warmth before events, unrelated, fell directly into the toilet.

The next few days would go on to involve incidents I had to stop counting, multiple police departments, multiple nights, security footage, forced entry, and ending with the last 24 hours that involved a group of three men at night, me and a wooden baseball bat.

My head hurts.

I feel so grateful for the people who surround me.

These statements are true in equal amounts.

Here is to the beautiful balance of standing up for yourself, letting those that love you stand up for you, standing up for other people and standing up for the people that you love.


III.

(related to II. and a reoccurring theme both as of late and forever)

What you do, individually, matters.

Don't let people fuck with you about this and don't let people shit talk who don't have their sleeves rolled up and hearts exposed in what matters. If they don't, they really aren't much more than those asshole old white dudes who sat in the balcony during The Muppet Show and talked shit about everything. (Admittedly funny as fuck at times, but, what were they actually doing with their lives other than sitting on a couch and watching/judging people actually doing shit?)

On levels political and personal, I want to applaud and encourage folks who are engaging. Who aren't sure what to say or do, but say or do something that matters anyway. It doesn't have to be perfect. It just has to be.

Thank you to those who are engaging in ways that feel scary or uncertain. It's important that this is happening on all levels. It's incredible how much matter can come out of one person's willingness to be a brave, bad-ass, imperfect motherfucker and address the things that need to be addressed in the world or in their lives all while being kind. (Being kind is what moves things forward in the world. That balance of bold truth and kindness.)

Those who stay on their couches in their balconies can have their husks
their scraps
their private frowns.

Perhaps one day they'll join us.

(pause)

I'm going to leave you with this quote. The ideas within the words have been sticking with me in past few weeks in ways that matter:

"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again...who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly."

Here's to those who have gotten off their couches and stepped out of their balconies to engage in love and in what matters.



Be well; be loved,

k.


(title: 2nd half: Most of my life I have over related to Corey Haim's character in the movie Lucas. )
(Image: Chris Friel, 8:28 week 3 #6)
(quote from T. Roosevelt)

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