The Depths of Daze and the Problem of Prophecy

 

I left work early because I was too sad to focus. 

The sun is shining, and I am grateful for that. I am burning one of my favorite sticks of incense (the thicker kind; the kind that look like miniature logs) and am sitting in front of the heater in the 'kitchen' aka behind-the-couch. 

I came home with the plan of jump roping while crying in order to get some of this emotion out of me. 

I jump roped for about 4 minutes, but have shed no tears.

Sometimes 

(most times)

when I am disappointed or hurt

it takes me days and nights to really feel anything. 

Instead, what I feel is a kind of 

shocked sadness. 

The sadness is felt

but the depth of it has yet to be touched: 

Feet straining to find the bottom of the pool 

in order to assess 

the danger of drowning.

be well; be loved,

k.

[image credit: via archaic wonder tumblr. Information : Roman Amethyst Intaglio of a Girl Riding a Sea Monster, 1st Century BC/AD. This was possibly made by the master carver Dioscurides, who was the favorite gem carver of the Emperor Augustus. It is possible that this intaglio portrays one of two possible subjects, the nymph Aura or a Nereid riding on a sea-bull, sea-goat or some other type of horned sea monster. A small seal swims in the ocean behind them]